Friday, November 30, 2012

Meanwhile...Last Month in New York



During Game One of the ALCS, The New York Post reported that Yankee third baseman Alex Rodriguez wrote a note on a baseball to be given to some women in the stands asking for their phone numbers. One of them was said to be Australian model, Kyna Treacy.

This is their story.

ALLEGEDLY

KYNA TREACY: I’m so happy you got my phone number tonight. I was hoping you would notice me in the stands and this…it’s just like a dream come true.
ALEX RODRIGUEZ: Huh? Oh, sure. What’s your name again?

TREACY: It’s Kyna.

RODRIGUEZ: Right. So Kylie, didn’t I look great out there tonight?

TREACY: Well, they did pinch hit for you. That was stupid.

RODRIGUEZ: No, dummy. How did I LOOK?

TREACY: Oh. Adorable.

RODRIGUEZ: Damn right, I did.

TREACY: Sorry you guys lost to Detroit.

RODRIGUEZ: We did? Oh. Whatever. Why are your clothes still on?

TREACY: Haha. Yeah, my poor baby. You can’t lie to me. I’ll make it all better. Let me get the lights…

/flips lights off

/rustling

/…

/rustling

RODRIGUEZ: Hmm.

TREACY: I’m sorry. Is it me?

RODRIGUEZ: Probably.

TREACY: It’s okay. This happens to lots of guys, I hear.

RODRIGUEZ: Sigh. Give me a second. And leave the lights off. I’ll be right back.

/leaves

/…

/slides into bed

TREACY: Oh my…OH MY!
/time passes

TREACY: Alex, that was amazing. Wow. I don’t know what you did, but WOW! I just want to look into those beautiful eyes one more time…

VOICE: Wait…NO!

/flips lights on
RAUL IBANEZ: Darn it.

TREACY: What the hell? WHAT THE HELL?

IBANEZ: Sorry. Alex said he needed my help again and, well, yeah.

TREACY: I’ve never felt so used.

IBANEZ: That’s hard to believe. Sorry. Feel free to help yourself to the complimentary basket of hundred dollar bills near the door on your way out. That’s Alex’s usual way of saying he’s sorry.

TREACY: Ugh. Fine. Tell the LOSER he can go to hell.

IBANEZ: Will do.

/goes into next room

IBANEZ: Job done. Again. I’m out of here, bro. The girl says you can go to hell.
RODRIGUEZ: Okay. Wait, what girl?

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